You Know What? Screw You
by betrayed miko
Summary: Love forces people to change and lie, to keep secrets so they can not hurt anyone they love. Even at the cost of their lives. Lelouch lies to keep Suzaku from finding out who he truely is, Suzaku feels like he's being played and cheated on.


**Disclaimer:Masterlenx and I ****do not own Code Geass****, and we ****do not make any money**** from these writings.**

Lelouch woke feeling the morning light through the half lidded blinds as he moved to sit up rubbing at his sleepy orbs before looking down to the brown hair teen laying beside him on his stomach with an arm around Lelouch's bare waist. A smile formed as he watched his companion sleep silently still. He tilted his head to the side his dark strands sliding over his violet orbs as he slid carefully away from the other and across the room to the dresser pulling out his school uniform and Suzaku's outfit for today's class.

Lelouch moved into the kitchen of the small apartment getting breakfast ready for the two and for Nunnally who would be awoken after Suzaku snuck out from the apartment. The two having a secret relationship they even kept from Nunnally. He didn't mind at all wearing another mask besides that of the Eleven's hero Zero. He was so use to keeping his lives separate from every one of his lies he formed even playing Suzaku along to make sure he didn't get himself killed fighting his pawns he used to attack Britannia.

After a short 15 minutes Lelouch returned to the bedroom with a try holding two plates of eggs and sausages. "Time to get ready for school Suzaku."

"Lelu…" Suzaku murmured the raven's name under his breath, the teen's name escaping his mouth more of a sigh then anything, which explained why the male didn't respond to him. The bed shifted, and all-too soon the familiar heat and warmth of Lelouch's body was gone. The brunette cracked an eye open lazily, his hand feeling along the warm spot on the bed were his – dare he say it? – boyfriend had been lying.

Boyfriend.

The concept was still new to him, even if he'd been sneaking in for over a month now.

The room went silent, and Suzaku held in his breath, shutting his eyes tightly when he saw Lelouch starting to turn towards him. For a few seconds he was sure his fake-sleep-while-observing-Lelouch's-ruffled-figure act was blown. The sound of drawers opening and sliding shut reached his ears, along with the quiet, light breathing of the raven's draws of air – the door opened, shut, and silence reigned.

Suzaku decided to take it upon himself to get a little bit more shut eye, which eventually, as it always did, turned into him falling into hard sleep again.

"Time to get ready for school, Suzaku."

It felt like thirty seconds, when in reality it'd been – or had to have been – a good thirty minutes. The brunette would've pretended to have kept sleeping, would have, if the smell of food hadn't hit him hard. Immediately before he could roll over and feign the 'waking-up' yawn, a loud, gurgling noise of his stomach rumbling in hunger erupted in the quiet room, startling the silence that had begun taking over after Lelouch's entrance.

Suzaku cracked an eye open, staring with a bleak, hazy green eye up at Lelouch, an innocent smile beginning to form on his lips. "No chance of just forgetting that I'm awake and letting me go back to sleep, huh?" Who cared about school, anyways?

"I don't know who cares that suddenly we both aren't in our classes?" Lelouch spoke in a hushed warning tone as he sat on the bed placing the trey between them smiling faintly. "We have to make certain we are not caught Suzaku and if we both start vanishing on the same days people will grow suspicious of us." Lelouch moved in taking his plate and fork slicing in to the yolk causing it to bleed out a little into the sausage. "You know how students would react."

He moved his left leg over his right leg as he moved tilting his head once more to the other. "Come now Suzaku better eat up so you can sneak out my window to your room before class starts in 30 minutes already got your clothes out and your breakfast prepared so get going." He smirked playfully at the emerald orbed boy.

Throughout the raven's entire 'lecture', Suzaku arranged himself in an Indian-seating style, crossing his legs over one another as he let out another tired yawn. He ran his hand through his untamed brown locks, blinking owlishly at Lelouch once, before his eyes settled on the offered food. Whatever the raven started to say beyond 'we have to make certain...' fell to deaf ears as he grabbed his own plate, beginning to plow it down. It was still a wonder to many how on earth he managed to eat all of it, and still be in shape. "Is this it?" The question was blunt and innocent as he glanced up in time to catch Lelouch's eyes, grinning brightly. "And, who cares if we're both gone on the same day? Jeez, you skipped all the time with that kid didn't you baby?"

The affectionate term seemed oddly misplaced coming from his lips. Over the last week, through a series of embarrassing nicknames centering around 'honey', 'Lulu-sweetie', and finally landing on 'Baby', Suzaku had taken it upon himself to figure out an affectionate term. All had resulted thus-far in glares and, occasionally, a steamy slap (those nights, of course, he hadn't been welcomed to sneak in, but after Lelouch fell asleep he managed to weasel into the room one way or another). "To gamble? It isn't NORMAL for two friends to want to sneak out and skip school?" Suzaku asked teasingly, though without too much persuasion started to get up, popping his muscles tiredly as he reached out and grabbed his uniform. "I think you just make me keep going because you want me to spend hell with you."

Lelouch glared once more as he huffed out another term he hated dearly. Just because they were gay didn't mean they had to act like the stereotypical ploy of what heterosexuals thought of them, but a playful smirk formed on his pale lips as he waited for the last of the brunette's words to pass. "I gamble yes, but I manage to make it back in time for class except when I fell in that stolen vehicle, which we will not discuss ever again, second it's not normal right now, not with this war going on between the Britannians and the Elevens think of you're place as a Britanian soldier, third you keep up the sweetie, hunny, and baby crap I'll flip you on you're stomach and make you cry for mercy as I top you." Lelouch spoke coldly looking to the other he wasn't one for taking crap especially from someone he did like dearly, he wasn't going to give in and let the other act like that especially in the public view of his classmates especially the President knowing far well she would drag herself into it and promote it like it was a trophy win for herself.

"You know how Madam president gets when she sets her eyes on couples.... Remember the last couple she managed to break up because she kept reporting everything they did or tried to do over the loudspeaker?" Lelouch spoke a lot calmer now as he allowed a sigh to escape. ".... Just think about it, let us settle into what we have and need to work on before we try and promote ourselves with a pride flag."

Settle? For how long? A few more months, years?

Suzaku wanted to ask each of those questions slowly, to make sure that Lelouch could see the picture in his mind that was forming with each word the raven said. No matter how long they waited, he knew that Lelu would just prolong it longer – if anything, Suzaku knew that he wouldn't let his pride ever get trampled on. Being held out amongst other students as a gay person, or worse, being gay with an eleven of all people, wasn't Lelouch's style. For how long he'd known the raven – from childhood beyond, the brunette knew that that sort of thing wasn't an option. Not after all the other teen had gone through.

While Suzaku kept his tongue, listening to the raven's explanations (in his mind, excuses for cover-up), he merely smiled, sliding his plain t-shirt off of his body. From years of training under constant stress, the brunette's body had hardened and scarred into a pleasing piece of art – bronze, sun-tan skin was tight with thickening muscles; a few scars were littered along his upper body and concealed lower body as well. One of the few things about Suzaku that Lelouch would probably never achieve was, of course, his desire to hide nothing. There wasn't a trace of embarrassment thus-far at showing any part of his skin to the raven, or anyone else, for that matter.

"Do you really want to start that this morning?" Suzaku sounded almost breathless as he tugged on the top of his uniform, pausing halfway to stare down at the still-seated teen . The constant fighting and bickering over who was 'topping' had been a delicate issue that was generally avoided, given it'd left both of them just wanting and neither willing to give in.

"Ne? Lelu?"

"Lelouch?" A softer voice broke up Suzaku's words. The brunette froze, glancing up at the door at Nunnally was lightly rapping on. Her voice was the softest, most recognizable voice in the world – Suzaku was willing to bet on it. While Lelouch's little sister was generally a pleasure to hear, at the moment, it was the last thing the brunette wanted to be hearing at this time in the morning. "It's time to go – are you okay? I thought I heard someone talking."

"I'll see you later okay? Get the look off your face and smile for me, I'm going to be late for class." One of us, anyways. Silently, before the raven could protest, Suzaku gave himself the momentary pleasure of leaning down – his lips collided with Lelouch's own gently, still slightly-awkward from their strange moments of exploration before, but he was growing better at the chaste touches. "Don't have too much fun without me." It was always the quick tastes, Suzaku thought to himself, that made him long for more.

Lelouch watched the brunette cover up frowning a bit at the others scars feeling a bit guilty for a few mostly from the fights they had gotten into with Black knights. He sat back on the bed as he sat on the bed as Suzaku fully dressed his violet orbs shimmering in the morning sunlight as a smile form. He did feel guilty for wanting to keep the relationship a secret, but it wasn't because Suzaku was an Eleven, but more or less in case he got caught.

Lelouch did not want Suzaku to get caught either by the Black Nights or the Britanian soldiers who might think Suzaku was in on the plan to take down the Britanian Empire. Bad enough he was already putting Nunnally in danger, but he kept her in the dark as well.

Lelouch was finally brought back to reality when he heard the soft voice of his sister then Suzaku's smart ass. A frown formed as he turned his attention to the door before the brunette gave him a kiss something that they had in fact had down pretty good, but not yet an art form. A light blush formed on his pale cheeks as he watched the other leave out the window as he moved to answer the door.

Nunnally sat in her chair quietly with C.C. standing next to her an emotionless expression as always, causing Lelouch to frown. "Lelouch C.C. came to visit with me again today she's been telling me about the relationship you two have." Nunnally spoke putting her finger tips together as she smiled.

C.C. moved past the young girl and into Lelouch's room causing him to shift slightly as she moved to the window to make sure the coast was clear as Lelouch spoke up to his younger sister. "Nunnally I set up you're breakfast at the table."

Nunnally frowned slightly as she rested her hand on the arms of the chair. "Thank you big brother have a good day at school." She moved her right hand to the control on her wheelchair pushing on the handle leading her into the kitchen.

Lelouch moved back into his room where C.C. had taken a seat holding her Cheese-kun doll that had been tossed in the corner by Lelouch when Suzaku stayed with him. "Are you still going through with your plans today Lelouch?"

Lelouch glared at the witch as he moved over folding his arms. "Of course I got the office on cue to send me a message saying I was needed someplace I will tell Suzaku to stay with Nunnally while I'm out so the plan of getting under his radar is complete."

C.C. flipped her green strands back as she looked back to the other frowning now. "You know you keep this up you're going to get caught by the white knight." She ran her fingers over the dolls soft fabric. "You can't keep playing the role as the fake boyfriend to him, he's going to catch on."

Lelouch moved collecting his things after he got dressed in his uniform before gathering his things for class. "It's fine C.C. I won't let you're contract get canceled. Now go and inform the Black Knights so they are ready when I get there." Lelouch spoke coldly as he left the room leaving the girl behind as he made it into the hallways and down to his first class on the ground floor. Moving inside he took a seat up in front and across from where Kallen would usual sit he knew exactly where his pawn was a devilish smirk playing on the demon's lips.

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"Hey Suza… Lelouch, he seems kinda withdrawn lately."

The sound of his locker shutting loudly was all that was heard moments later, until Suzaku's emerald-green eyes looked over to a pair of startlingly blue eyes. The brunette didn't quite know Lelouch's self-proclaimed friend entirely well, and, not only because of that but due to the simplistic nature of being jealous of anyone who was even remotely close to the male besides him, Suzaku wasn't entirely sure if he liked the prying male. Maybe it was just because Rivalz had spent so much time in Lelouch's life over the years, while he'd been absent from it, or maybe…

It was because he didn't quite like look that crossed the other's features whenever he looked at the dark-haired male.

Forcing a plain smile onto his lips, Suzaku merely shrugged. "He seems fine to me." Maybe he was missing something… unless Rivalz's is just fishing for information? The tan-skinned teen's smile stretched further at the thought. "Somewhat cocky… saying what you plan to do before you have a chance to even mention it… Still Lelu to me." With an air that suggested conversation was over, Suzaku started away from the locker, heading towards and all-too familiar classroom where he spent most of his leisure time seated behind his boyfriend, pretending to be paying attention when he was honestly just staring and admiring the back of the raven's head. Suza was more than sure Lelouch was aware of his daily, habitual staring and fantasizing, but thus-far hadn't chided him for it.

As far as anyone knew, he was just daydreaming, staring straight ahead of him at his friend's head. "I know it's just… He doesn't seem willing to do anything outside of class anymore. You two leave and he doesn't barely answer his cell anymore – so," Rivalz's voice was annoyingly close. The blue-haired male fell into pace beside him, not stopping even after they reached the classroom – Suzaku had half a mind to open his mouth and politely state he'd better run off to his class, and a few moments later, before the male had a chance to finish whatever he was rambling, he cut him off. "Listen, bell's going to ring – you should probably head to clas-"

"This is my class. Doah," blue met green in a placated silence. Suza's mouth slowly closed, mirroring a thin line of annoyance perfectly. It took a lot to wipe away the smile that usually adorned his face, but for some reason… Lelouch's long-time friend pissed him off to no end. "As I was saying… There's a party going on at my home. I thought it'd be cool if the two of you showed up." Suzaku's eyes narrowed. The translation of Rivalz's words were: if you go, I'm sure Lelouch will too.

"Yeah, I'll think about it." Resisting the nasty urge to slam the door in Rivalz face, he instead held it open, letting the oblivious and pleased-looking figure walk into the classroom, making his normal bee-line straight to Lelouch. He watched with expressionless green eyes as the male sat next to his boyfriend, his lips moving, saying something he believed to be a joke, because moments after he shut his mouth Rivalz started laughing at his own joke.

Stupid fuck.

Suzaku smiled brightly.

The brunette started towards the various desks, taking one just behind Lelouch, given that both on either side of the raven were taken currently.

The party-suggestion, he'd make sure, wouldn't quite make it to his boyfriend.

Purple hues met the slender teen he referred to in privacy as boyfriend. He saw his long time friend from school come in when Suzaku causing his mind to wonder to what the two might have been talking about before class. Something he'd have to wait to ask later tonight if the mission was finished by then.

His orbs closed when he heard the bell finally ring after giving out a carefree smile to Rivalz trying his best to continue his so called friendship with the teen who tried to make everything a joke. Finally he thought silence from Rivalz, but not from the teacher going over the lesson at the front of class.

He wasn't going to be there long and on cue 20 minutes into class he received his note during a transition in class from passing in and reviewing homework to working on what the homework would be for that night.

"Suzaku keep Nunnally entertained for me won't you?" Lelouch spoke as he glanced back to the other as he closed the note quickly in his hand. "I'm picking some things up for Nunnally for her birthday." His voice was soft as he glanced over to Rivalz who was already trying to peak over to hear what he was talking to Suzaku about.

"Boss, I didn't get my note, are we not going out to gamble?" Rivalz spoke in a confused tone not really understanding and having been use to the other taking him along.

'What?' The thought struck him hard, confusion swallowing up what little anger or attention he was centering around Rivalz's idiotic presence. His eyes had been continuously dropping towards the blue haired male, annoyance spreading as quickly as a drug; watching him laugh and talk to Lelouch over the past half hour had been torture, especially given that the male had had the nerve to sit next to Lelouch.

Suzaku's brow rose in question, ignoring Rivalz's confused inquiry – he wanted to open mouth and kindly point out that if Lelouch had cared for him to be around at all the might've invited him over more often to do things but… He kept his lips sealed, satisfied partially, yet at the same time stunned once more when Lelouch turned to face him, telling him abruptly that he was leaving to pick things up for Nunnally's birthday.

"What?" The brunette voiced the word out loud this time, confusion striking him hard. 'Why didn't he just mention this earlier?' That was something the raven would've generally invited him along for… Suzaku watched with widened green eyes as Lelouch crumpled the paper in his hand tightly, rising to his feet. For a few moments the brunette simply sat there, a tense unease gathering in his gut. There was an unfamiliar flare in his boyfriend's eyes – something he wasn't used to… It only appeared, he'd noted especially as of late, whenever Lelouch disappeared for periods of time.

Which had been increasing lately. Suzaku would've brushed it off as nothing if it hadn't been for the sudden spark of excitement, anticipation in the other's eyes, or the way he seemed all too eager to simply leave. "When'll you be back Lelu? Tonight we were supposed to-…"

Go on a date.

Suzaku froze, his lips closing as he sat back into his seat, seemingly resigned. His eyes shut as Lelouch left, his heart clenching tightly, resentment building up into his throat. 'Maybe… maybe he's seeing someone else?'

_No… Lelouch… Lelouch wasn't like that. _

_He wasn't._

Somewhere in the back of his mind, where Suzaku liked to black out his doubts…. The word 'maybe' was still resounding loudly.

_Maybe _Lelouch wasn't. Or… maybe he was. It'd definitely explain the raven's hesitance at letting him get too touchy or close to him. Or why he didn't want people seeing them together… Maybe he didn't want his other boyfriend knowing he was playing him as well.

_Maybe_.

Lelouch had caught a glimpse of a tinge of worry in his boyfriend, but his attention had turned to the other his so called friend. "No not today I have business to take care of on my own." Lelouch spoke in a calm tone as he turned back to Suzaku his purple hues never leaving Suzaku's emerald orbs.

"The family game night tonight with Nunnally will be put on hold for now, don't worry I'm sure I can make it up to you, maybe bring you back a gift for you. Especially for keeping Nunnally entertained and safe while I'm out." Lelouch spoke softly in a calm demeanor.

Standing carefully he walked past his friend leaving his boyfriend behind.

He did feel guilty for leaving his boyfriend like this, but he needed to get to his contacts to cause the disturbance in town causing him to have the excuse of being trapped and unable to return anytime soon.

He had forgotten everything about the date thinking that it was just one of those nights that the three got together to play games.

Another excuse to sleep and cuddle together after Nunnally fell asleep.

-----------------------------------------

Ding. Ding. Ding. Ding. Ding. Ding.

Six.

Suzaku's eyes cracked up towards the clock as it sounded off the time, green eyes growing contempt.

"Suzaku? It's your turn." Nunnally's beautiful smile was still in place as she stared at him – well, not really stared, but in her own strange way was letting him know she was somehow, uniquely, watching him. "You need to spell a word! If you don't, I'll be in the lead by 14 points!"

He smiled, offering a faint 'yep!' before glancing down at the board, lips pursing. Without thinking, or even really trying, he pressed down two letters at the end of one of Nunnally's words: Trait. With a quick flick of his wrist, the new word that was formed was:

_Traitor_.

Another hour passed.

Another.

_Jealousy._

Another.

_Irrelevant._

Another.

_Pain._

"Suzaku… are you okay? You seem kind of down tonight."

Maybe he should've thought more carefully about expressing himself on the board? Nunnally had a horrid habit, in his opinion, of easily connecting with someone when something was wrong. Suzaku was so flooded with his thoughts he didn't realize Nunnally was speaking until he felt her fingers press down on top of his, squeezing gently. He glanced up at her, chuckling softly. "I'm alright."

"Don't worry," she squeezed again, smiling, "Lelouch'll be back home soon. He only missed out on tonight's game."

Oh… but it was so much more then that.

Lelouch had ditched them on one of their super-rare _dates_.

Their first date, ever.

His fingers clenched the second Nunnally's cool fingers left his skin. "You should probably head to bed Nunnally." In response, she only just smiled at him.

It was time to go home…. Lelouch obviously wasn't coming, he just knew it.

-----------------------

It was pitch black out. Suzaku wasn't entirely sure what time it was. Last he'd check was when he'd gotten up from his empty bed; he'd spent the last four hours rolling over and over, staring up at the ceiling, the floor, then the windows. The entire sky was pitch black and smothered in gray – no stars, no moonlight… The kind of night where Suzaku's already tired, angry body was pulsing, ready to jump up at moment's notice. Despite all of these distractions he could've focused himself with, the brunette's eyes always returned to the silent bulge in his pant pocket, where it remained as silent as the streets he was wandering.

It'd become habit, a sort of dayly (or nightly) ritual that he would often times skim the edge of the city, observing the Shinjuku area, part of him half-expecting Zero to appear. Even if he hated the man with a passion, and wished nothing but ill-will to him, more times then not when his mind wasn't clouded with thoughts of Lelouch it was filled with the darkly-clad 'Eleven-hero'.

Now was one of those times.

He paused midway across a bridge, leaning against the railing to stare out over the vast, ruined outskirts of Shinjuku, green eyes tired with disappointment yet always, always alert.

There was a sharp flicker of moment out of the corner of his eyes, and Suzaku's heard turned to the right sharply, glancing over one of the massive, fallen buildings. He skimmed over it, squinting when a distant, almost nonexistent flicker of light caught his eyes once more in one of the buildings, before it too was snuffed out, leaving only a trail of darkness that soon melted in with its surrounding.

'Must've imagined it…' Suzaku sighed, reaching down in his pants to withdraw his cell phone. He sifted through his messages, from texts to voice mail, but there was nothing new whatsoever. After a moment of suffocating disappointment, the brunette moved to shut off the damn thing, when it seemed to explode with noise. The familiar drum-march ring-tone that Lelouch had one 'teasingly' set to the 'Lord of Pudding' filled his ears, and instinctively Suzaku answered it.

"Suuuuzaaakkuuu! Wake up sleepy head, we need you down here right _now_!" There was an unfamiliar tone of urgency to the man's voice that Suzaku had never heard, for it took him a few seconds to recognize the man. "Lord Pudding?"

The only answer he got was a resounding huff, followed by just the words he wanted to hear: "Zero's been spotted! He's in the Shinjuku Area, where Elevens and amassing Knightmares were spotted!"

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